Seven o’Clock, and All’s, Well, Going As Expected
The surprisingly agreeable job #4 has come and gone, and school session #17 is now underway. For many reasons, this upcoming school year will be an especially important one in the context of my life, and for once, these reasons include more than just music. That is not to say, however, that this will not be the most important year so far in my musical life. It is possible, but that remains to be seen. While I have several enormous projects that must be completed within the upcoming 8-12 months, more fundamental issues of life are at the core of this year's great importance. What do I want out of life? What do I want to accomplish in my lifetime? What kind of person do I want to be? I am running out of time to provide answers to questions such as these. Once they are answered, I must figure out my means, and I will settle for nothing less than achieving the ends I have deemed necessary.
I have made a bit of progress in these areas; that is to say that I have come to a few conclusions already about how I want my life to turn out, but I am not about to divulge any of that information, most of which would probably be less interesting to my readers than a Final Fantasy review anyway. Fortunately, that is not the purpose of this post. This will basically serve as an outline for the less intimate details of my everyday life because I have learned through experience that people rarely know anything that I am doing with my present life or what is going on with me in any capacity whatsoever. Don't worry. I take all the blame/credit for that. My life has been extremely complex and confusing, and I should have been more transparent as events unfolded. I hope to clear up some common misconceptions about me along the way.
I can't think of anything else, but I am thinking about writing an early autobiography or at least a pamphlet that I can hand out. Whenever I need to tell people things about my life, I feel like I'm trying to sell something I don't personally believe in. And why should I? Is the path that I am taking through life the best one I could have taken? How much more successful could I have been at this moment had I lived differently? Like music, there is no "perfection" to be found in life, so where does that leave a perfectionist like me? My life presently is a busy, anxious mess, and until I start achieving some of my goals, it looks to remain that way. Maybe that won't even stop it – but it'll surely be a relief.
Labels: Brainstorm